Surf's Up!

BANDA ACEH, INDONESIA -- Wax on, bro. Load up the Woodie. This is the one you’ve dreamt of your whole life. Meteorologists from the National Weather Service in Hawaii are forecasting hellacious monster waves all along the coasts of the Indian Ocean. Four story deep water swells with bitchin’ offshore breaks indicate big time tow surf conditions. These insane conditions call for big dog cojones only, no beach gawking wusses allowed. For all you goofy-footers, the best left-to-right breaks will be off Sri Lanka.

Shane “Weevil” Williams, who pulled off a 2004 Top 5 ranking by nailing two 25’ers at Weimeia, was stoked. “Dude, this is awesome. It’s like Jaws or Mavericks times 10 out there. Ravedog tried to boge my ride, but I had position and I just dropped in and took a bitchin' 15-mile pleasure cruise. I mean I am stoked. I can’t wait for the next ‘nami. Yeah! Dude, it’s all good…except for all the dead people. ”

In a related story, an estimated 400,000 people were killed by the giant tsunami and the ensuing disease and starvation.

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